There's a vicious rumor going around about 'MAD' cows. I'm here to tell you there is no such thing, cows aren't even the slightest bit testy, never mind mad. They are the most genteel and pleasant of bovines. The word mad isn't even in their moocabulary. I mean vocabulary. I've been around a lot of cows, and I have never heard them UDDER an unkind word from their little cow lips. Go find a pasture and check out the cows. They will be either all standing together or all sitting together in a little cow circle; no dissent in cow land. They hardly ever walk or run, although I did see a running cow when I was a child, the sight has stayed with me to this day. Anyway, the rumor of mad cows is a Big Ugly Loathsome Lie! And who-----wait a minute! Hold the phone, I think I just figured out who is spreading this crap around. Have you no decency, Sir??
